Jump to content

Pitchfork (s)hit-job review


Recommended Posts

I just finished it. Christ, whoever wrote it really just doesn't like her does he? The somewhat oddly gleeful "oh she doesn't make hits anymore" beginning would never be written about her if she were a man. Is there anyone else 37 years in who has reviews of their current work opening like this?

'many of Madame X’s songs trip all over themselves to change course and offer something new every few seconds for the attention-span deficient'. Talk about trying to colour complex song structure as a negative. I would argue that it requires a greater attention span in order to appreciate songs that change course as much as Madame X songs do. It's a strength that the album has. 

And the section about her appropriation, I mean, what exactly could she do that these people would be happy with? The notion that you should just stay inside your box and never be influenced by anything outside of what is considered your appropriate cultural creed is just... So limiting. 

I appreciate that some of the lyrics come across ham-fisted but they truly are coloured in the worst light possible in this review.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

yup. rich is a mariah stan. he doesn't even like "vogue" all that much. and he trashed confessions on his blog back in the day. OF COURSE that's who reviewed the album for pitchfork. it never even had a fucking chance. 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

25 minutes ago, bardo said:

yup. rich is a mariah stan. he doesn't even like "vogue" all that much. and he trashed confessions on his blog back in the day. OF COURSE that's who reviewed the album for pitchfork. it never even had a fucking chance. 

 

I actually think Rich loves Madonna but he's one of those guys who only likes to  view her through one lens - a fan who is kinda living in the past in other words. The fact that likes Mariah Carey is kinda cringe and weird since she makes music that pretty much the entire universe knows is pretty bad, but serves a purpose in showcasing Mariah's admittedly great voice (but again, if you wanna talk about someone who needs to hang it up... look no further than her. Her voice is gone and that's all she really had to sell her really generic music). But it's irrelevant. He loves Madonna and he is a fan, but he probably has some sort of beef with her, and FOR THAT REASON, he does not need to be reviewing Madonna albums. It's wholly inappropriate and goes to what @bardo just said. Madonna never had a chance. All parties came into this with an agenda. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 minutes ago, Ai Papi Si. said:

I actually think Rich loves Madonna but he's one of those guys who only likes to  view her through one lens - a fan who is kinda living in the past in other words. The fact that likes Mariah Carey is kinda cringe and weird since she makes music that pretty much the entire universe knows is pretty bad, but serves a purpose in showcasing Mariah's admittedly great voice (but again, if you wanna talk about someone who needs to hang it up... look no further than her. Her voice is gone and that's all she really had to sell her really generic music). But it's irrelevant. He loves Madonna, and FOR THAT REASON, he does not need to be reviewing Madonna albums. It's wholly inappropriate and goes to what @bardo just said. Madonna never had a chance. All parties came into this with an agenda. 

i don't know where you got that he loves madonna. he doesn't even like her. he likes some of her 80s dance stuff. but he even gave that a back-handed compliment in this review.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

rich is one of those bitchy gay men who thinks being contrary, snarky and subversive = being intelligent.

i'm not surprised at the bad review from pitchfork

Link to comment
Share on other sites

17 minutes ago, bardo said:

i don't know where you got that he loves madonna. he doesn't even like her. he likes some of her 80s dance stuff. but he even gave that a back-handed compliment in this review.

I'll tell you how I know.

In 2008 I was 22 years old and after he stumbled upon me online (via means we won't get into!) he thought I was cute. So he hit me up. We chatted. At the time, Madonna was doing Sticky & Sweet and I talked about how I wanted to go to the show. That's when he showed his Stan chops. 

His knowledge of Madonna is as intricate and as obsessive as yours or mine. He knows every album, project, moment, quote, whatever. He of course loves Erotica, Bedtime Stories. He told me! He thought she was kinda losing her cool at the time though, trashing Hard Candy and basically saying that she was getting desperate and old.

My theory? He stopped liking her once she decided to lean into her age, whether it was wearing outfits that showcased her olympian body, singing with young acts like Timberlake, dating young men like Jesus. Madonna stopped playing the game of settling for middle-aged sunsetting, and it wasn't for him. He resents her boldness and her willingness to be hated. And look, Madonna is zany and her references are weird and she's not exactly anyone's idea of PC. I get that the persona isn't for everyone. But what exactly is so horrible about this album other than the fact that she didn't give him remixes of her debut album or another Stuart Price affair? He can't seem to decide himself. He doesn't know what to make of her and it frustrates him so he just decides she sucks so her music sucks. Fallen fans are like that. 

Look at Mariah. She's settled into being just as much a niche act as Madonna, but her lack of ambition is pathetic in its brazenness. Women like Mariah Carey lie down on sofas and mime pre-recorded vocals, then get lifted by 15 men in sailor outfits, her idea of a show. That's his entertainment. That's why he hates Madonna now. But trust me, he oves Madonna, the concept, the symbol, the idea. He still Stans for it. She's just not doing it his way. 

I've read a lot of him over the years.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Future feat Quavo

We knew this was coming... their entire staff hates her. The writer being a Janet and Mariah stan is a hilarious coincidence but nothing significant 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 minutes ago, Ai Papi Si. said:

I'll tell you how I know.

In 2008 I was 22 years old and after he stumbled upon me online (via means we won't get into!) he thought I was cute. So he hit me up. We chatted. At the time, Madonna was doing Sticky & Sweet and I talked about how I wanted to go to the show. That's when he showed his Stan chops. 

His knowledge of Madonna is as intricate and as obsessive as yours or mine. He knows every album, project, moment, quote, whatever. He of course loves Erotica, Bedtime Stories. He told me! He thought she was kinda losing her cool at the time though, trashing Hard Candy and basically saying that she was getting desperate and old.

My theory? He stopped liking her once she decided to lean into her age, whether it was wearing outfits that showcased her olympian body, singing with young acts like Timberlake, dating young men like Jesus. Madonna stopped playing the game of settling for middle-aged sunsetting, and it wasn't for him. He resents her boldness and her willingness to be hated. Like most provincial people that hate women like Madonna. And look, Madonna is zany and her references are weird and she's not exactly anyone's idea of PC. I get that the persona isn't for everyone. But what exactly is so horrible about this album other than the fact that she didn't give him remixes of her debut album or another Stuart Price affair? He can't seem to decide himself. He doesn't know what to make of her and it frustrates him so he just decides she sucks so her music sucks. 

Look at Mariah. She's settled into being just as much a niche act as Madonna, but her lack of ambition is pathetic in its brazenness. That's why he hates Madonna now. But trust me, loves Madonna, the concept, the symbol, the idea. He still Stans for it. She's just not doing it his way. 

interesting. since this is getting personal (i have a story of my own), i tried to message you privately but i'm not allowed to for some reason. maybe i haven't been a forum member long enough or is that a bug?

Edited by bardo
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, bardo said:

interesting. since this is getting personal, i tried to message you privately but i'm not allowed to for some reason. maybe i haven't been a forum member long enough or is that a bug?

Just messaged you. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The fact that he mentions The Rain Tapes. Ugh... He doesn't deserve 2 know the Rain Tapes. That tragic gay though 🤣 he's not even a real journalist... It's a fucking blog 😅 my mom has a blog

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, acko said:

The fact that he mentions The Rain Tapes. Ugh... He doesn't deserve 2 know the Rain Tapes. That tragic gay though 🤣 he's not even a real journalist... It's a fucking blog 😅 my mom has a blog

Yep. If that doesn't underscore what I meant when I said he should not be reviewing Madonna, then I don't know what does.

I get it, everyone has a right to their opinion. But I feel like there needs to be a least some level of non-bias with reviewers. Why would anyone want a Gaga Stan or a Mariah Stan to write reviews in prestigious publications? You're not getting a real review. The same applies in reverse. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...