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Transgender teen suicided, revealing unsupportive Christian 'parents'

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UNION TOWNSHIP, Ohio — A 17-year-old transgender teen was struck and killed by a passing semi trailer on an Ohio interstate on Sunday, and a previously written suicide note later appeared on the teen’s Tumblr blog through scheduled publishing.

Leelah Alcorn was in the roadway when she was struck, and is believed to have walked 3-4 miles from her parents house in nearby Kings Mill, Ohio.

Police say she died at 2:20 a.m. Sunday.

The incident is being investigated by the Ohio State Highway Patrol, but local media have reported the incident as the death of a teen “boy,” using Leelah’s (male) birth name, and have made nomention that she was transgender.

Following the incident, this entry appeared on Leelah’s blog describing the pain of being “a girl trapped in a boy’s body” and her Christian parents’ refusal to allow her to transition:

SUICIDE NOTE

If you are reading this, it means that I have committed suicide and obviously failed to delete this post from my queue.

Please don’t be sad, it’s for the better. The life I would’ve lived isn’t worth living in… because I’m transgender. I could go into detail explaining why I feel that way, but this note is probably going to be lengthy enough as it is. To put it simply, I feel like a girl trapped in a boy’s body, and I’ve felt that way ever since I was 4. I never knew there was a word for that feeling, nor was it possible for a boy to become a girl, so I never told anyone and I just continued to do traditionally “boyish” things to try to fit in.

When I was 14, I learned what transgender meant and cried of happiness. After 10 years of confusion I finally understood who I was. I immediately told my mom, and she reacted extremely negatively, telling me that it was a phase, that I would never truly be a girl, that God doesn’t make mistakes, that I am wrong. If you are reading this, parents, please don’t tell this to your kids. Even if you are Christian or are against transgender people don’t ever say that to someone, especially your kid. That won’t do anything but make them hate them self. That’s exactly what it did to me.

My mom started taking me to a therapist, but would only take me to christian therapists, (who were all very biased) so I never actually got the therapy I needed to cure me of my depression. I only got more christians telling me that I was selfish and wrong and that I should look to God for help.

When I was 16 I realized that my parents would never come around, and that I would have to wait until I was 18 to start any sort of transitioning treatment, which absolutely broke my heart. The longer you wait, the harder it is to transition. I felt hopeless, that I was just going to look like a man in drag for the rest of my life. On my 16th birthday, when I didn’t receive consent from my parents to start transitioning, I cried myself to sleep.

I formed a sort of a “fuck you” attitude towards my parents and came out as gay at school, thinking that maybe if I eased into coming out as trans it would be less of a shock. Although the reaction from my friends was positive, my parents were pissed. They felt like I was attacking their image, and that I was an embarrassment to them. They wanted me to be their perfect little straight christian boy, and that’s obviously not what I wanted.

So they took me out of public school, took away my laptop and phone, and forbid me of getting on any sort of social media, completely isolating me from my friends. This was probably the part of my life when I was the most depressed, and I’m surprised I didn’t kill myself. I was completely alone for 5 months. No friends, no support, no love. Just my parent’s disappointment and the cruelty of loneliness.

At the end of the school year, my parents finally came around and gave me my phone and let me back on social media. I was excited, I finally had my friends back. They were extremely excited to see me and talk to me, but only at first. Eventually they realized they didn’t actually give a shit about me, and I felt even lonelier than I did before. The only friends I thought I had only liked me because they saw me five times a week.

After a summer of having almost no friends plus the weight of having to think about college, save money for moving out, keep my grades up, go to church each week and feel like shit because everyone there is against everything I live for, I have decided I’ve had enough. I’m never going to transition successfully, even when I move out. I’m never going to be happy with the way I look or sound. I’m never going to have enough friends to satisfy me. I’m never going to have enough love to satisfy me. I’m never going to find a man who loves me. I’m never going to be happy. Either I live the rest of my life as a lonely man who wishes he were a woman or I live my life as a lonelier woman who hates herself. There’s no winning. There’s no way out. I’m sad enough already, I don’t need my life to get any worse. People say “it gets better” but that isn’t true in my case. It gets worse. Each day I get worse.

That’s the gist of it, that’s why I feel like killing myself. Sorry if that’s not a good enough reason for you, it’s good enough for me. As for my will, I want 100% of the things that I legally own to be sold and the money (plus my money in the bank) to be given to trans civil rights movements and support groups, I don’t give a shit which one. The only way I will rest in peace is if one day transgender people aren’t treated the way I was, they’re treated like humans, with valid feelings and human rights. Gender needs to be taught about in schools, the earlier the better. My death needs to mean something. My death needs to be counted in the number of transgender people who commit suicide this year. I want someone to look at that number and say “that’s fucked up” and fix it. Fix society. Please.

Goodbye,

(Leelah) Josh Alcorn

There was a second post made on her blog that says sorry to his brothers and sisters.

And now for my sorry notes to some people I knew…

Amanda: You are going to have such a wonderful life. You are the most talented and pretty little girl I’ve ever met and I love you so much, Amanda. Please don’t be sad. I’m going to miss you so very much. I love you.

Tiffany: We haven’t talked much recently since we’re both so busy but I’m so happy you’re my sister. You are so courageous and determined to achieve what you want, you can accomplish anything. I love you.

Justin: We’ve been jerks to each other a lot recently but I really do love you. You get on my nerves almost all the time but no matter what a part of me will always love you. Sorry for picking on you so much when we were kids.

Rylan: I’m so sorry I’m never there for you. I love you so much.

Abby: Thank you for dealing with my pathetic problems, all I did was make your life harder and I’m sorry.

Mom and Dad: Fuck you. You can’t just control other people like that. That’s messed up.

I don’t really feel the need to apologize to anyone else… odds are you didn’t give a shit about me and if you do, you did something that made me feel like shit and you don’t deserve an apology.

Also, anyone who says something like “I wish I got to know him better” or “I wish I treated him better” gets a punch in the nose.

The mother's reaction to the media attention:

10897084_745127525563328_115218847764834

[These responses seem fake to me, but its making the rounds]

-

This is so incredibly sad.

Another reason for religion to be eradicated.

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So very tragic.

R.I.P

Don't know whether those posts of the mother's are real, but this definitely was

enhanced-3841-1419965861-3.png

:megamanson:

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Death by itself is so sad. There are no words to describe death by suicide. The level of despair a person must be feeling is unfathomable, not to mention the effects on other family members. I just hope the person has found peace. It's so sad to think of the greatness that could've come out of this young person's life. :(

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So sad. RIP Leelah and hopefully your words can reach other people.

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Guest bluejean

That is so incredibly sad. I do feel sorry for the parents as well who are obviously so misguided and ignorant.

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It's disappointing and sad about this kid committing suicide. Extremely religious and anti-gay folks don't realize how potentially traumatizing and painful it feels for kids and even adults to be rejected and shunned by their families because of their sexual orientation/gender identity. :sad:

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Ahhh, she didnt have to die :(

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Breaks my heart. When all these hollier than thou assholes speak their bullshit like they are the voice of god herself they don't care nor understand that they hurt the most fragile of us : children & teens. Sadly it's hard to protect them from their families.

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Omg so sad she was pretty. his parents are fucking disgusting and ignorant.

2462362435.si.jpg

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Tragic story. :(

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Another sleepless night for me...i kept thinking about the notes she wrote on her Tumblr and i read articles online. Seriously, people should really pass an exam before they are allowed to have children.

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Another sleepless night for me...i kept thinking about the notes she wrote on her Tumblr and i read articles online. Seriously, people should really pass an exam before they are allowed to have children.

They really should.

RIP Leelah.

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RIP Leelah.

Never forget who you are

Little star...

Never forget how to dream

Butterfly..

:(

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Her parents are horrible people, they should feel bad about themselves.

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So sad to read that. Leelah's ignorant hateful parents make me so angry. I hope they are prosecuted for something!

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I hope her parents both suffer from Shakira's stds especially the ones that oozes discharges of purple and green.

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Another suicide from Turkey. 24 year old transexual woman commited suicide yesterday. She jumped from the bosphorus bridge. That bridge is a popular place for suicides unfortunatley. On her way to the bridge she recorded a video with a last message. She was frustrated she wasnt accepted and was belittled and used.

Also the lgbt community in Turkey is very passive. They do not nothing for the rights. Many gays lesbians trans people are very unhappy with them. Even the gay pride week in istanbul, they cannot organise a good festivitiy.

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