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Madonna To Open "Hard Candy" Fitness Centers Around The World


renee205

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My name is Madge

I'll do your fitness tonight

With anal bleaching darling

Open tonight

I'll be your sorceress, your heart's magician

I'm not a witch, I'm a tone technician

With 10 dumbells all on site, you will gain more power

I'm gonna change your life, Ill clear your fucked up bladder.

Do sit ups, do as I say

Do sit ups and you will fuck more gays

I'll give you love, I'll make sure ur hard as fuck

I'll give you love, I'll tighten up your stomach...

My yoga moves off stage

And i jump a lotta rope

fuck off about my age

you aint gonna cope

If youre on time and your bodys not fragile

Bend over baby, you better be agile

We do nails and facials, 'til they're nice and soft

And when your pits start to sweat, I'm gonna lick them off.

:lmao::lmao::thumbsup:

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Guest Coked Up Baby Boy

Madonna: Hard Candy [Deluxe Fitness Edition]

1. Give Steroids 2 Me

2. She's Not Fit

3. Devil Wouldn't Recognise You [so Slim Anthem]

4. Heartrate

5. Mile Run

6. 45 Minutes

7. Big Dumbell [Aka: Ring My Bell]

8. Across The Thigh

Bonus song:

8. Cellulitation

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Madonna: Hard Candy [Deluxe Fitness Edition]

1. Give Steroids 2 Me

2. She's Not Fit

3. Devil Wouldn't Recognise You [so Slim Anthem]

4. Heartrate

5. Mile Run

6. 45 Minutes

7. Big Dumbell [Aka: Ring My Bell]

8. Across The Thigh

Bonus song:

8. Cellulitation

Oh my God :rotfl::lmao:

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My name is Madge

I'll do your fitness tonight

With anal bleaching darling

Open tonight

I'll be your sorceress, your heart's magician

I'm not a witch, I'm a tone technician

With 10 dumbells all on site, you will gain more power

I'm gonna change your life, Ill clear your fucked up bladder.

Do sit ups, do as I say

Do sit ups and you will fuck more gays

I'll give you love, I'll make u hard as fuck

I'll give you love, I'll tighten up your stomach...

My yoga moves off stage

And i jump a lotta rope

fuck off about my age

you aint gonna cope

If youre on time and your bodys not fragile

Bend over baby, you better be agile

We do nails and facials, 'til they're nice and soft

And when your pits start to sweat, I'm gonna lick them off.

Best Ever, :lmao:

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Mmmm, mmmm

Say good-bye to drinking with friends

And holidays in far off lands

Say good-bye to having that brand new car

She taught me that

And I'm a MEMBER -never mind what it cost me

My other kidney can function on its own

I'm a MEMBER -sold my house to pay the fees

I'm a MEMBERRR

Inside I was a fan

That could not get enough of her

Outside, she looked for a way

To make my wallet sing

And I'm a MEMBER -never mind what it cost me

My other kidney can function on its own

I'm a MEMBER -sold my house to pay the fees

I'm a MEMBERRR

I learned

to let go

of every last dime I that I possessed

I learned

to let go

(I even bought her H&M dress)

And I'm a MEMBER

..fitness

I'm a MEMBER[i'm a MEMBER]

Mmmmm... [i'm a MEMBER]

Mmmmm...

No I've never been afraid to buy

AND I finally have another reason why

I'm a MEMBER[i'm a MEMBER]

No I've never been afraid to buy

AND I finally have another reason why

I'm a MEMBER[i'm a MEMBER]

No I've never been afraid to buy

AND I finally have another reason why

I'm a MEMBER[i'm a MEMBER]

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Mmmm, mmmm

Say good-bye to drinking with friends

And holidays in far off lands

Say good-bye to having that brand new car

She taught me that

And I'm a MEMBER -never mind what it cost me

My other kidney can function on its own

I'm a MEMBER -sold my house to pay the fees

I'm a MEMBERRR

Inside I was a fan

That could not get enough of her

Outside, she looked for a way

To make my wallet sing

And I'm a MEMBER -never mind what it cost me

My other kidney can function on its own

I'm a MEMBER -sold my house to pay the fees

I'm a MEMBERRR

I learned

to let go

of every last dime I that I possessed

I learned

to let go

(I even bought her H&M dress)

And I'm a MEMBER

..fitness

I'm a MEMBER[i'm a MEMBER]

Mmmmm... [i'm a MEMBER]

Mmmmm...

No I've never been afraid to buy

AND I finally have another reason why

I'm a MEMBER[i'm a MEMBER]

No I've never been afraid to buy

AND I finally have another reason why

I'm a MEMBER[i'm a MEMBER]

No I've never been afraid to buy

AND I finally have another reason why

I'm a MEMBER[i'm a MEMBER]

By the way to get the FULL EFFECT of this, you have to play 'I'll remember' on youtube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0628NtGJAWQ

and SING ALONG using MY LYRICS. Much HILARITY will DOUBTLESS ENSUE.

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Only on MadonnaNation would this NON EVENT turn into a 4 page disaster where the forum's funniest members and the most humorless collide :lol:

And only on MadonnaNation would Supernatural find a way to mention Fatney Beers and Sir Nana in THIS of all threads :doh::lol:

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You realize Madonna doesn't own/manage it and Guy just wanted a check to cash to let them use the name of her worst album?

Well, should they open a facility in NY I would still definitely check it out. All the gyms around here are horrible, even the sports club/la gyms despite them having a hotel like atmosphere. WHo knows it may be everything I'm looking for in a gym.

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Guest ladyluck13

I hope Australia gets one... I doubt it though..

Ill just have to work out in mexico city instead!

hope we get our own dressers and hot dancers in the change rooms!

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Ok wow, i dunno if those are normal prices for a gym but fuck!! me in the ass with the prices.

It has been reported in local papers that the inscription fee is 3500 pesos (300 USD) and a monthly fee of 160 USD uhmm WTF!!!! that is A LOT!!! now u KNOW that only rich guys will be there o_O

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:lmao: @ all the fans having a meltdown because she's opening a fitness centre. Yeah sure, she's done. she'll never make more music again...with the state her "fans" are in,maybe that's a good thing.
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:lmao: @ all the fans having a meltdown because she's opening a fitness centre. Yeah sure, she's done. she'll never make more music again...with the state her "fans" are in,maybe that's a good thing.

:lol: Only Madonna fans.

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Ok wow, i dunno if those are normal prices for a gym but fuck!! me in the ass with the prices.

It has been reported in local papers that the inscription fee is 3500 pesos (300 USD) and a monthly fee of 160 USD uhmm WTF!!!! that is A LOT!!! now u KNOW that only rich guys will be there o_O

ouch - well thats still better than the monthly payment that 'allaboutmadonna' were quoting to say it was...$700!

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Def, the same way there are fans that critizice her there are some that if she shits in a can and sell them would say she is so innovative and shit :lol:

Anyway, i dont care she is openning a fitness center, just that fucking stupid awful name :/

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